Memoirs: Cold Fury..

My depression today…

Thanks to my therapist, I was able to finally internalize that when I’m in a depressive mood, it’s because it’s taking me closer to my wounds. Wounds I would otherwise ignore if my grandiosity was still functional. But it is now defunct, so I have to listen to my depressive mood and find out what it’s telling me.. I’m sad that I can’t go back to my happy past. And I’m raging mad on realizing that my past wasn’t happy, but a reward of being successful at projecting my false self. Knowing that my good life wasn’t mine to own, and would be withdrawn the instant my false self failed.

I’m dealing with a great range and cold fury against my mother. I find myself deliberately going against her whims and training. I feel free when I no longer cater to her or treat her special. I’m mad at how I gave up my play time to cater to her, liking foods and snacks she liked. I had to excel academically because it made her proud, and whenever someone beat me, I would pay for failing her. I couldn’t participate in extra-curricular because they brought no pride. Though they made me happy, I had to give them up.  

That I couldn’t speak up when someone sexually assaulted me at age six, because I was scared that I would embarrass her. I didn’t know it was sexual assault, but I had seen her deal with someone who embarrassed her by ‘getting herself into trouble’ even when that person had no fault – her other daughter; my younger sister.

I saw how she treated my younger sister with contempt because she usually spoke her mind and lived in the moment. She was severely beaten for mistakes I would be pardoned for. I got gifts even when she deserved them. She got none when she deserved it but only got gifts when I got gifts too. She would convince my dad to ignore my sister when she wanted a particular favour withdrawn from her daughter.

I was so scared of losing her love because I saw firsthand what she would do to me if she stopped loving me. I had to earn it. But, in my early adulthood, I felt her full wrath because I made choices that went against her. ‘Choices’ like developing fibromyalgia, being admired by males because I was beautiful, choosing long straight hair and not liking her sense of fashion and copying her. Loving my boyfriend and not dumping him because she didn't see anything she could flaunt about him.. I idealized her. I knew my life would be unbearable materially if she no longer loved me. The indignation of ‘poverty’ scared me to death.  I still got my share of punishments and beatings, but my false self always got me more rewards than punishment. We weren't punished for what we did, but for how we made her feel or how we made her look in front of others.

That is what the anger is doing to me now. It’s forcing me to break that bond, by going against my training. Going against the program to seek her love. Now on the other side, I feel a need to be selfish. I’m not sure if it’s the right thing to do; I just feel the need to do it.

I guess that is why my dog is so spoilt. She doesn't behave like a dog in my presence, but like a ‘person’ with choices, who ‘feels’ like she can go against her training. She doesn’t do that to others – she is a very disciplined, balanced, cooperative German Shepherd when being handled by others. It’s like, with me, she can express herself as a dog… I guess I ‘trained’ her to have what I never had. The freedom to be bored, aroused by toys, be happy for simple things that matter to her without worrying about repercussions from me..

Feel free to weigh in. But, my depressive ‘mood’ has been alleviated by this piece.

This is Serenity>>

More reads...

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Feeding your dog raw

Raw diet for dogs is one avenue that isn't explored by pet owners.
Besides filling your dogs' bellies, food plays a role in the dog's immunity, appearance and even moods (yes.. dogs do get sugar-high!!).

What is raw.?
Raw diet can be partially or fully raw. Partial raw diet involved mixing raw meat and bones with cooked or processed dog food.
Full raw diet is entirely raw meat and bones, with complementary starch, veges and fruits to balance nutritional value.

Why raw?

While the debate is still on, it's important to note that dogs, by nature, are meat eaters, and not entirely omnivores.
Grain-based diets were introduced by man as a supplement since the canines entirely depended on man for food as they didn't have to hunt.
Dogs can digest certain grains, fruits and vegetables (cooked).

Raw diet is attributed to benefits such as:

* Increased calcium intake
* Cleaner teeth
* Shinier coats
* Smaller stool
* Higher energy levels

Racing greyhounds and sled-pulling dogs have long been on raw diet. This is due to the high protein profile of the diet, essential for the development of muscular dogs to perform the jobs they are bred to do.

Risks..
Raw diet poses some risk though. When not properly handled, there is risk of:
* Health risk from bacteria
* Potential of chocking from bones ( if you feed the dog small pieces or fish still on the bone. Avoid feeding dogs large fish unless its a fillet).
* Potential of teeth breaking (I personally find this risk unfounded since a dog will know how hard to bite on a bone to extract the marrow. Unless the dog is fed a dry or cooked bone, without meat, then the dog will stop crushing once the gums start to hurt).

A raw dog food diet typically consists of:

* Muscle meat, often still on the bone
* Bones, either whole or ground
* Organ meats such as livers and kidneys
* Chicken parts eg heads and feet
* Raw eggs
* Vegetables like broccoli, spinach, and celery
* Apples, avocado, pears or other fruit.
* Some dairy, such as yogurt, cheese and some cream.

Raw diet is an avenue that can be explored, provides the person handling the food is clean and thorough.
Plus, your dogs will definitely love it.

More reads...
* Canine distemper
* German shepherd dog
* Canine parvovirus
* Rabies

Source:
Permd.com
Woldtucker.co.uk

Hair Health: Iron and healthy hair

It's no secret that healthy, lush hair is a sign of good health. Since the hair and nails get nourished last, brittle hair and nails are usually a very good indicators of nutritional deficiencies.
Iron deficiency is a prime suspect for hair loss. 

Iron deficiency:

Iron is important because it helps you get enough oxygen throughout your body. Your body uses iron to make hemoglobin. Hemoglobin is a part of your red blood cells. Hemoglobin carries oxygen through your body. If you do not have enough iron, your body makes fewer and smaller red blood cells . Then your body has less hemoglobin, and you cannot get enough oxygen.Iron deficiency is the most common cause of anemia.

Other common symptoms include:

• Hair loss
• Fatigue
• Pale skin
• Reduced cognitive skills
• Feeling cold all the time
• Increased risk of infections
• Irritability
• Brittle nails

Low iron levels can be caused by several different factors, including a variety of medical conditions, diseases and, ultimately, a poor diet. The main contributing factors include:

• Excessive bleeding (heavy menstrual periods in particular, though the bleeding can be gastrointestinal or colorectal, too)
• Medical conditions to slow your ability to absorb iron from your diet
• A poor quality diet
• Blood donation
• Medications or food choices that hinder the absorption of iron in your diet

*painful joints? Find out if glucosamine supplements can help

Daily dose of iron

Women need 14-15 mg of iron in their diet daily. DO NOT overdo the consumption. Overdoing can and will cause more harm than good. It's actually toxic, so if you suspect low iron levels, a blood test is the best place to start.

Ranferon-12 blood builder

Vitamin C is known to boost absorption of iron so taking your iron supplement with a glass of juice is well advised. Also, eat plenty of fruits to boost absorption of iron from your diet, in case you opt not to take iron supplements.

Our scalp is like a garden. The stronger the roots, the better is the growth, and foliage (or in this case, hair thickness!!)

** more reads **

※ Why your nutrition affects your hair

※ Joint mobility: glucosamine

 ※ HEADACHES: migraines, cluster headaches and what they are about.

image credit: fontanabeautyvibes.com

Puppy Health: Hip dysplasia

Hip Dysplasia..

What is hip dysplasia

In dogs, hip dysplasia is an abnormal formation of the hip socket that, in its more severe form, can eventually cause crippling lameness and painful arthritis of the joints.
Hip dysplasia is one of the most studied veterinary conditions in dogs, and the most common single cause of arthritis of the hips.

Dogs with genes for hip dysplasia may or may not develop the disease; a dog without CHD genes is in the clear.

Hip dysplasia in dogs is extremely painful, and it is heartbreaking for any dog owner to have to witness his or her dog suffering. The condition is so serious that your dog will struggle to do normal activities, and the pain so severe that it can even change your dog's temperament

What does a normal hip joint look like?

To understand hip dysplasia we must have a basic understanding of the joint that is being affected. ;

**The hip joint forms the attachment of the hind leg to the body and is a ball and socket joint. The ball portion is the head of the femur while the socket (acetabulum) is located on the pelvis. In a normal joint the ball rotates freely within the socket. 

To facilitate movement the bones are shaped to perfectly match each other; with the socket surrounding the ball.

Are dogs born with hip dysplasia?

Hip dysplasia is a genetic disease. 

Dogs are not born with hip dysplasia, but puppies that are genetically predisposed to it may develop it in varying degrees. 

The severity of hip dysplasia has an effect on when the dogs show symptoms of this disease and on how long they tend to live.

How hip dysplasia looks like..

Abnormal hips cause an abnormal gait so that dogs with hip dysplasia often "bunny hop" or use both back legs simultaneously to hop when they run.

Canine hip dysplasia symptoms can include difficulty getting up from a sitting position, climbing stairs, and squatting to urinate or defecate. Dogs with hip dysplasia tend to have a narrow stance, that is, stand with their back legs close together.

Symptoms and diagnosis..

Some dogs actually have mildly dysplastic hips when they're young (noted on X-ray), but won't have canine hip dysplasia symptoms until they're older. Older dogs tend to have less muscle mass to hold their bones correctly, so that's when dysplasia is obvious, even though it existed for several years. Dogs with severe hip dysplasia have obvious problems when they're young.

The diagnosis is often made based on the physical exam and your dog's symptoms.

❃ Difficulty rising
❃ Waddling gait
❃ Back legs kept close together
❃ Short stride
❃ Shifting weight from one leg to another when standing
❃ Bunny hopping
❃ Falling over when squatting to urinate or defecate
❃ Thigh muscle wasting

X-Ray photo of hip dysplasia

Manging hip dysplasia

Homeopathic remedies are always recommended before giving pain medication, since pain medication has potentially dangerous side effects.

Natural remedies for dogs with hip dysplasia:

You can help ease your dog's pain if he or she suffers from hip dysplasia. Since canine hip dysplasia is a form of degenerative arthritis, joint supplements, which help dogs with arthritis, can also help your dog with hip dysplasia. Other options  include homeopathic remedies, Omega 3 fatty acids, antioxidants,NSAIDs, and as a last resort, pain medications (steroids).

Which dog breeds are more susceptible to hip dysplasia..

Certain large breeds are more prone to CHD than others and include; 

❃ the Newfoundland, 

❃ Saint Bernard,
❃ Old English Sheepdog,
❃ Rottweiler,
❃ German Shepherd,
❃ Golden Retriever,
❃ Alaskan Malamute,
❃ Labrador Retriever
❃ Samoyed.

❃Great Danes

❃ Bull dogs

❃ Mastiffs

❃ American Staffordshire terrier

❃ Pugs

★★★ Hip dysplasia also occurs less commonly in smaller breed dogs and cats.

What to do???

Exercise. Regular, low-impact activity such as swimming or leash-walking will help reduce some of the pain in your dog’s joints. It will also lead to increased tendon and muscle strength. TIP: When walking, try to keep your pup away from hard surfaces like concrete or asphalt.  It’s hard on the joints and might do more harm than good.

Physical therapy.can really help reduce your dog’s pain and increase his mobility. From massages to hydrotherapy – the use of underwater treadmills – physical therapy can be a great option when done right. Before starting, be sure to talk with your veterinarian who knows your dog’s limitations

Joint prescription diets or formulas, recommended by your veterinarian, can help decrease inflammation and promote cartilage healing.

Give your pooch pain medications, like NSAIDs (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs), to reduce pain, but only as directed by your veterinarian.

 Create a dog-friendly environment using ramps or easy steps to help your dog into a car, bed, or around the house. Limit your dog’s movement up and down steps. Soft mattresses work well too, and a heated dog bed in cold weather can be great. TIP: Be careful with regular heating pads, as they can get very, very hot and burn your pooch.

Acupuncture as an ancillary

Surgery can help in many cases. Various surgical procedures have been described including juvenile pubic symphysiodesis and total hip replacement (see below). Your veterinarian will advise you of the various surgical procedures, if an option for your pet, and will refer you to a veterinarian who is a board certified specialist in surgery if appropriate.

Juvenile pubic symphysiodesis. It’s a mouthful, but it describes a short, simple surgical procedure for very young puppies in breeds with a high likelihood of developing hip dysplasia. It is a preventive procedure, often combined with a neuter or spay.

Total hip replacement.  This is an option in dogs with especially severe hip dysplasia and can really increase quality of life if successful.

Thist isn’t comprehensive – there are a variety of other procedures and recommendations, and your veterinarian will be the best resource in determining what is right for a dog diagnosed with hip dysplasia.

Sources:
Wikipedia
Pet education website
USDAA.com
Pet-web website
Vca hositals.com
Healthy pets.com

Canine journal.com

Pet health Network

(Image credit: Wikipedia, pet education)

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※ canine parvovirus

※ Rabies

※ Fleas in cats and dogs

※ Mange (Fleas and pets)

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Let it all out...

Let it go...

Sometimes you wish You could just end it all
Too much pain... too many tears.
Until you are knocking on deaths door...
Then it hits you...
None of them will be there with you..
Not one who made you smile again..
Definitely not the ones who made you cry..

When you aren't ready but you're feeling like the moment is coming..
You plead with yourself to fight... and promise yourself never to be so foolish!!!

Stop letting people direct your destiny...
Its not worth sacrificing your dreams for someone who wants no peace..

Everyone hurts some way..
Everybody's been there...
Everyone has a scar...
But that 'don mean i must cover mine!!

Some are best loved at a distance...
Because you cannot bear to hate them...

I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky..
Make a choice.. take a chance ..
And break away...

I am a fighter...
I ain't gonna stop...
There is no turning back...
I've had enough!!!

I will find another way.. 

It's not my time to go..

I guess i will die another day!!

**This is Serenity***

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♥ Perfect
♥ Firework
♥ Self promotion isn't self glorification
♥ Finding the new normal
♥ To Forgive
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(Image credit: art.com)

Microchips and pets..

What is a microchip? 

Microchips are tiny transponders, about the size of a grain of rice, that can be implanted in your pet's skin. It is not a GPS tracker so it cannot be used to locate a lost pet. It is mainly for identification and authentication.

Both cats and dogs can have the microchip inserted.
It is particularly important if the animal is pedigree as they are the ones mostly stolen by backyard breeders. You are able to prove that the pet is yours.

microchip (size)

The difference between a microchip and a GPS tracker.

The biggest difference is that the microchip for dogs is used for authentication of a lost pet, while the GPS Tracker is used for locating and tracking your pet in realtime!
A gps Tracker is approximately the size of a car key. Most trackers come as collars since its too big to be implanted under the skin.
Trackers consists of a expensive GMS module, GPS-antenna, LED and a battery. It would practically be impossible to place all those components into such a small device like the microchip for dogs, even with state of the art technology.
Studies are however being conducted to develop a gps tracker the size of a normal microchip.

gps tracker collar

How is the microchip inserted?

The microchip is implanted just under the skin, between the shoulder blades, with a syringe. The pet hardly feels anything during this process.
A skilled vet or paravet can easily do the procedure.
The best part is that its impossible for anyone to locate it without a scanner so chances of a thief removing it is zero.

How does the microchip work?

Each microchip contains a registration number and the phone number of the registry for the particular brand of chip.

A handheld scanner reads the radio frequency of the chip and displays this information. An animal shelter or vet clinic that finds your pet can contact the registry to get your name and phone number.
When a microchip scanner is passed over the skin of a microchipped pet, the implanted microchip emits an RF (radio frequency) signal. The scanner reads the microchip’s unique ID code. The microchip registry is called, and the registry company uses the ID number to retrieve the pet parent’s contact information from the pet recovery database.
The records can be stored with the East Africa Kennel Club or the Kspca.

How long does it last before replacement?
You only need to have the microchip implanted once as it should last for the lifetime of your pet.

What should you expect once your pet is microchipped?
Should your pet go missing, the person who finds them can call Kspca or the East Africa Kennel Club where they can confirm that your pet belongs to you so they can be returned home safe and sound

Pros of having a microchip?
It's like a pet ID with details of the animal, breed, and details of the owner.

What are the cons of a microchip?
Pet microchips are not tracking devices. They are radio-frequency identification (RFID) implants that provide permanent ID for your pet. Because they use RFID technology, microchips do not require a power source like A GPS tracking device,

What to do when your pet is lost...
Report as soon as possible to relevant authorities. You can visit or call KSPCA and tell them the details. In case you find a pet you suspect is yours the scanner will come in handy for identification purposes.

How are your pets tracked and identified?

With GPS trackers, you can proactively track your dog’s location, because it is using both satellites and cell towers to determine the location of the device. This allows for a much more extensive range than microchips, making it possible to track your pet across the country.

Studies are still being done for a gps tracker the size of a microchip.

Microchips however are important since you can prove beyond all doubt that the pet belongs to you.

My horror story...
I remember one afternoon when I came home only to be told my dogs were gone. Someone had left the gate open and wasn't kind enough to let me know till hours later.
I was sad.. worried and devastated. I walked and called for hours. I asked neighbours who weren't even neighbours... until a security guard told me he had seen two men dragging two dogs with chains and locked them in a particular home - my neighbour!!!! Upon asking the servants they started acting dodgy, denying what the eyewitness had said. I could see my dogs struggling from the enclosure and they were whining in distress!!!   

I was denied audience but i was relentless. I calmly went home, took my pick up truck and parked right in front of their gate - no one going in or out until the owner arrived an hour later. I was so mad i forgot my shoes in the car and started giving her an earful while shifting on my bare feet!!! She was stunned and embarrassed. She asked her gateman to open the gate and I drove in like a boss!!! The Pompeii volcano had nothing on me!!! I did not care for anything - I was trebling in anger, agony and sheer murderous thoughts.

Long story short, I got my dogs back and they got to know one livid neighbour lady who just loves her dogs... happens to know where they live..

Moral of the story? Save the adrenaline for the Armageddon. Have your pets microchipped.

If my dogs were microchipped i would have easily established they were mine and I would have had the moral authority to burn that mansion down!!!

This is Serenity!!!

**in case you have any queries please contact me via email: mburu.njeri88@gmail.com or call/text/whatsApp +254725733412

image credits:

sacurrent.com, wikipedia.org, pet-travel.com.consumer-reports.com, prweb.com,marbellafamilyfun.com, warable.com

Our Father...

Dear Daddy...
Aba Father...

Abu...
Baba...

You mean the world to me.
Without You this life is pointless.
I remember a time I was so alone, I wanted to die, but You let me live.
I remember when I begged death to take me - trade in with Joan, but You let me live...

For a long while I wanted to believe that You don't exist.
Wishful thinking got me believing You don't care..
But the problem was with me...
I never came to You for ANYTHING!!!

I imagined that I could do it all by myself.
And I got hurt again and again..

And, after all this nonsense, ashamed and bruised...
You still embraced me when I crawled back to You.
You did not rebuke me...

When I cried You hugged me and wiped my tears..
You listened when I called You..
You opened gates for me and closed doors my enemies were using...
You talked to me often.

Let's just say, Your love for me amazes me.
I love You back...
I am not ritualistic... I hate religious frenzies, especially when they make me numb!!

But, my love for You still burns..
Your precepts amaze and inspire me.
I will follow Your word because in Your presence there is love, joy, peace, stability and growth.
Your presence keeps me alive.

Loving You is life for me.
I love You Father..

This is Serenity...

(Image credit; youtu.be )